Excerpts from the Book

Following are a handful of excerpts from the book. I hope you enjoy them as much as I enjoyed writing them! – Katherine Dedrick

Preface:

This book is what the title says: it is a compilation of my 10 most important life truths that I wish someone would have told me a long time ago. But there were precious few female mentors and, really, mentoring has not been an embedded part of a woman’s growth process. Men have always had sports and team play and the old-boys’ club. Until recently, women didn’t even have sports. It’s just the way it was, and in my humble opinion, it is only beginning to improve.

So, these 10 Things are some of the most important truths I’ve learned. These 10 are the ones that most often come up among my friends and peers. We have had the same experiences, the same issues, questions and worries, most of which could have been vaporized by knowing these 10 Things. Had someone simply told me some of these things at the beginning of my journey, it would have lessened a lot of the head-banging-against-the-wall I went through to learn them. I’m not saying that I still would not have had to learn some of them on my own, but having someone guide you, or let you know a few Things, is nothing but good.

I hope at least one of these 10 Things does you some good and instills confidence, self-esteem and continued good growth. I hope that when you find the one that speaks to you, you feel a sense of recognition and comfort and pure, charged energy.

THING 1: So, You’re a Bitch – Welcome to Our Club

The Thing
I am sorry to have to tell you this and maybe, just maybe, it will not happen to you, but for some reason if you are aggressive in the pursuit of your goals, someone, at some time, will likely call you a “Bitch,” or other similar but equally irritating word like “pushy,” “headstrong,” or better yet, and one of my personal favorites, “too intimidating.” Each of which really translates into one of the most ironic phrases of all time: “You are too aggressive.”

After much self-reflection and internal struggle, I (and many of my friends) have come to the conclusion that each of these titles is really a badge of honor because what it really means is ….

THING 2: Swim in the Stream Going Your Way

The Thing
Bit by bit, and way too far along in life, I realized that I had surrounded myself, or allowed myself to be surrounded by, too many people who did not give back or energize me. Instead, my time with them was always about them—solving their problems, standing up for them or just reassuring them of their greatness.

Now, here’s The Thing. These interactions sapped my energy and, worse, used up what little free time I had, so that I had no time left for people who energized and enlightened me. I became less of myself. I no longer knew what I wanted or who I was. My depth as a person diminished. I had lost me along the way, as well as those who were all around me going my way and offering me a hand. I inexplicably gravitated to those who needed me or had a problem I could fix, bypassing those who wanted to interact with me and offer me easy friendship and forward movement. Those people didn’t need me. There was no challenge there. It was too easy. Life is supposed to be hard right? What an idiot!

Instead, find the stream going your way, the life current filled with people who ….

THING 5: Networking – A Woman’s Game

The Thing
There are two Things, actually. First, and perhaps most important, is that women actually have an innate ability to network. We do it naturally and easily. What we typically don’t do is recognize its importance, network with a purpose and control how the networking is done. Second, if you learn to network with your goals in mind and in the atmosphere you enjoy, you’ll find that putting people together and getting things done just happens. In fact, networking with attention on your goals is one of the most freeing and rewarding things you can set in motion.

One of the best things I discovered about the art of networking is ….

THING 6: Your Absolute Asset

The Thing
This one is so crucial that if you learn it now and use it, you will save years of wasted time that I, and countless other women I know, lost. And even when we finally learned it, we still weren’t that good at putting it into practice. The Thing is: market your absolute asset and ask for what you deserve… I could go on and on with the worries and concerns I have discussed for hours with my friends over very, very, dirty martinis. But take it from me; we have analyzed this one to death, so you don’t have to waste your time struggling with it. The answers emphatically are: you are good enough; go ahead and ask.